November 22nd, 2012
Thanksgiving. A day for gratitude and over eating. What am I grateful for this year?
I am grateful for all the people who love me, and whom I love. I have a life full of loving, and caring individuals who support me. Whether they live with me, in the same town as me, in a different state or even in a different country. I have a wonderful network of friends, family and chosen family. And I am grateful for them every day of the year.
I am grateful that I was born in the USA, with it’s freedoms, democracy, and wide diversity of beliefs, people, opinions, and opportunities. So much of the world is drowning in poverty, oppression and war. I am grateful that I have so few barriers (and those mostly internal) to following my dreams.
I am grateful for this blog. I have this space where I can speak my mind, openly and without fear. I can share it with people or leave it to be discovered. I occasionally get comments, publicly or privately, that encourage me to continue. I am grateful for a place to share my journey with others.
I am grateful for the little things. For a hug when I need it most. For a whipping when I need to break. For knowing I’ve only cracked and pushing harder. For a bed to crash in. For smart ass jokes. For pictures of fire. For kitties. For a puppy curled up in my lap. For apologies. For thank you. For space. For closeness. For believing. For listening. For asking. For silence. For music. For a phone call. For a text message. For I love you. For mindless movies. For chocolate. For cooking lessons at 2am. For running out for take out. For comments, likes and loves. For comfy couches and fleece blankets.
Speaking of which, I have to be at work in 7 hours. Goodnight folks.
November 25th, 2010
Last year, I thanked everyone who helped me take my first steps into the local community and my first steps into personal growth and acceptance. Most of those people are still a part of my increasingly wonderful life, and I am still incredibly grateful to them all. The community here, my chosen family within the community, all are exceptional people who make my life joyful, interesting and entertaining. I am a writer, introverted, anti-social, quiet, and more at home in nature than a city. But I have found something incredible here. I have found acceptance and love, growth and exploration, and a life more full than I ever expected to have. My dream office is a furnished attic with pillows and a big circular window, a papasan and some bean bags. Used to be, I’d imagine myself spending most of my time up there, writing in seclusion and quiet. I still want that attic office, but now it is imagined for my private writing time each day, when I take an hour or two to myself amidst a life so full.
Thank you to my parents, for loving me and not asking too many questions.
Thank you to my hubby, for loving me and taking this journey with me.
Thank you to him and his wife, for making me a part of their lives.
Thank you to lover, for everything you gave to and shared with me.
Thank you to the crew, for being my chosen family, with all the joy and struggles of any family.
Thank you to the clubs and the patrons, for letting us do those things we do.
Thank you to the groups who organize the parties and the events, for providing a safe place to learn and explore and share with so many people.
Thank you to the munch, for giving so many a place to meet and enjoy each other with no pressure.
What are you thankful for?
November 18th, 2010
Life is hectic. People are busy and stressed and full of work and responsibility. The holidays bring on schedule changes and family gatherings and bigger loads at work as the year comes to a close. There is a often a lot of preparation for Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years and all the other holidays that fall this time of year. Dinners to plan and prepare, gifts to get, parties to plan and attend, even a convention or two. All this on top of an already busy schedule that was bursting at the seams. Add to that, if you will, new relationships, new jobs, job searches, and so many shiny distractions that a ferret would look like a Tasmanian devil trying to capture it all.
So, what’s a submissive to do? The wants and needs are all still there. He wants me to have a backbone, to ask for what I want or need. To speak up and communicate. I want to be as stress free as possible and not demand things he cannot provide. I want to let him know I still want things, want him, but I don’t want him to feel bad when we run out of time, or don’t have the space to follow through. Yes, I would like more follow through than we’ve had lately, but I understand that it takes work, time and patience to get what we want.
At the end of a long day, I don’t need him to summon extra energy to play with me when he’s exhausted. I don’t need him to suddenly let go of all the stress and focus solely on me. I would just like to serve him, quietly and without demands. Relieve some of the stress, in whatever small ways I can, which in turn, makes me feel better. Because, in the end, if we are less stressed, we’ll be able to make time and space for the other things we want to do.
My old editing job gave me my final payment today. I got myself the beginnings of my own bootblack kit. Just one of the stress free services I intend to offer him.
Only one more week to get a copy according to the publisher’s website: Daily Flashes of Erotica #1.
November 25th, 2009
It is that time of year, here in this part of the world, to give thanks for, well, everything. Gratitude is an incredible force in my life. I have been given the opportunity to do, be and explore so much in my life, especially over the last year and a half. I often joke about thanking certain people for “getting me into this” or pointing me down this road or showing me just how good it feels. This week, however, I am making it a point to honestly thank those people who have enabled me to live this life. There are a lot of people who helped me get this far, and who constantly encourage me to keep going. There are also people that I am grateful to, who have no idea where their support and teaching has allowed me to go. I thank them to, though more quietly and tactfully.
I am grateful to my husband for taking this journey with me. I am grateful to the one who took us to our first demonstration. I am grateful to the one who invited us to our first poly meeting. I am grateful to the one who invited us to our first dungeon and hosted my first kinky birthday celebration. I am grateful to the one who took me to my first Practice. I am grateful to the one who taught me the love of rope and the joy of suspension. I am grateful to the one who showed me how beautiful I am. I am grateful to those who welcomed us into this community. I am grateful to those who have brought love into my family. I am grateful to those who have taught me about myself. I am grateful to those who have accepted who I am. I am grateful to those who have listened and those who have offered advice. I am grateful to live in a time and a place where I can live my life however I chose.
Thank you for reading my blog.