The Kilt and a Prom Dress

October 19th, 2013

He wore his kilt! Finally! In public even. And he looked awesome. I wore my old prom dress, bright red, sleeveless and down to my ankles, with black thigh-high stockings and the old red heels. The engineer in a pretty sprarkly blue dress finished out our trio. I wore mine because he promised to cut it off, I’d been trying to plan that kind of scene for years, and it was worth the wait.


I was sitting with a group, to the side of the stage when he came over, big knife in hand. He grabbed some fabric in my lap and sliced it down through the hem. I must have move, because his finger slipped over the hilt and he cut himself on the back corner of the blade. Not bad enough to stop the scene, mentions of the first aid kit were made, but he dragged me up and out to the middle of the stage.

Circling like a shark, he grabbed bits of cloth and slice through. A shoulder strap fell to the floor, the other was sliced, but still lay across my shoulder, keeping the dress in place. Back cleared, the knife tip made a few light passes on skin. Delicious. Down to the skirt again. Stockings, too? Whatever you want. And the knife slid through nylon and tore through elastic. Bit by bit, the dress and stockings were shredded. Until it finally slid to the floor, and was tossed aside.

Still circling, he spoke to the crowd of another thing he loved about his big knife. Smack across my ass. Yelping and he continued to smack. Spinning because I had nothing to brace against, he kept circling for a bit. Then grabbed hold, braced himself and pulled me over his knee. I flailed and squirmed and squealed, trying to find balance and he paddled my ass. Finally giving up and slumping over his knee, he paddled harder, til I slid to the floor.

Kneeling now. He continued to circle, and I lose continuity. He cut loose a bit of remaining stocking, grabbed me around the throat a moment and then tied it round my right breast. Then beat on it with the knife while I screamed. Smacked my inner thighs a few times for good measure, too.

He tore up my dress with his hands, making a long strip and gagged me with it. Holding me still, he drug the knife across my back, in slow stripes. I whimpered after he finished each one, afraid to move while the blade touched me. Then he pulled me backwards, held me tight and cut the gagging strips away.

He was up again, grabbing bits of the dress, circling around behind. Nervous, but not moving, I waited. He tried snapping a piece, like a whip, but it was too light and not shaped right. So he knotted it instead, and it made a nice bludgeon. Far heavier than I thought that dress could become. He beat my back while I arched happily into it. Then around to my thighs. More screaming and squirming. Ow! Wooden floor hurts the top of my feet.

There was also the kicking. Booted feet, kicking my thighs further apart, kicking my crotch and my inner thighs. He pointed down at his boot once, and I kissed it and then moved forward to kneel on it, not sure which he intended. Then there was more kicking, and grinding of the boot heel into my thigh.

He grabbed me by the hair and dragged me to the wall, pulling me up, he had to give a verbal command to get me to my feet. Then he pinned me to the wall, spanking my ass while I yelped and writhed. 1. 2. 3. Orgasming in sudden stillness. I barely mumbled Thank you, Sir, before I was tossed back to the ground.

Kneeling again, dizzy and breathless. He knelt behind me, grabbing me tight, and I think there were a few more scratches across my back. Then he bent my head back and kissed me. I smiled up at him and kissed him again. So happy.


I cleaned up and discovered I had put the bodice with garter straps in the wrong bag, put on my red fishnet thigh-highs anyway, and wandered for a bit. He asked if I needed anything, and I said when I got cold, I’d probably want to borrow his jacket. He gave me his black button-up shirt instead. Perfect. About the time he started negotiating with the engineer for her scene, he tossed me into the circle shackles to keep my buzz going all night long.

Edit: There was also face slapping during this scene, but I still can’t remember where it fit into the rest, not that the last few paragraphs are in very good order, but still. I kinda lose my brain when he slaps me, right down into subspace in an instant. So very, very tasty and lovely, but it wreaks havoc on my memory and sense of time.


Bucket List 2013

January 10th, 2013

I posted last Thursday about trying new things this year, and the need to make a list. Last May, I posted a list of things I was curious about, and I’ve only managed to knock a couple things off that list. We did needles for my second time at COPE, and he bought a brand new dragontail, and have done quite a bit of bootlicking since that post. The adrenaline from the former was great, and the latter is even better than I hoped. So, what’s on my list this year? Where am I at on what’s left over?

Hot wax. Well, that shouldn’t be hard to check off the list on a Friday event some time. Just gotta ask and do it. Waterboarding and water boxes take a lot of planning and resources, still curious, but not on a “do right now” list. Breath play could be fun to experiment with, I’m still interested, but I have technically done it in a few different ways before. Anal play and vaginal fisting, both still curious, but not at the Top of the list of “things to do.”

So what else do I want to try this year?

What else haven’t I already tried? Let’s start there… browsing FetLife fetish lists for an answer to that… Cutting. Cell Popping. Flesh Hooks. Cigar Play. Strap Ons. Watersports/Scat. Playing Doctor/Medical Play. Enemas. Anal/Vaginal Hooks. Branding/Scarification. Age Play. Animal Play. Figging. Gun Play. Hypnosis. Sounds. Staples. Vacuum Bed. Zentai.

So, a lot of those are yes or maybes, a couple are no, and one of them is both.

Let’s start with the no category. Cigar Play. As much as I’m intrigued by the “bootblacking, chocolate and cigars” evenings I’ve heard about, I cannot abide that much smoke in the air. This is not the type of breath play I had in mind. Watersports/Scat – yeah, no. I mean yes, once I said I’d rather be peed on than be put in a box of snakes, but really, not a turn on at all. Branding/Scarification just sounds like a bad idea. I like the occasional scars, but I don’t really want them to be permanent. I like having a clean canvas to work on after a bit of healing. If I was going to get something permanent, it’d probably be a tattoo, and we know how I feel about needles.

So, does that mean everything else is a yes? Well, most of them are conditional yes, so let’s start at the top.

Cutting. He’s used his knife to cut cross-hatching in the top layers of skin on my shoulder blade before. But, given my dislike of blood, we’ve never gone further than little scratches. But I enjoyed it, I liked the rush that came with it (imagine that, me liking the rush), so, like needles, I’m curious about what more would be like.

Cell Popping. I dunno. The designs I’ve seen done with this have all been pretty cool, and they tend to heal after awhile. It could be interesting to do, if there was something I/he wanted temporarily ingrained into my flesh.

Flesh Hooks. This is a hell no. But I already owe it to him, so it’s not really? It turns my stomach to watch it at Trauma each year. But I accept that some day, I may do it, for the smile on his face and the glee in his eyes.

Strap-Ons/Pegging. Again with the I’m not sure. Not really keen on a dildo up my ass, as mentioned in other posts, my ass is a tender subject. But strap on vaginal sex could be interesting, with the right person. So, not necessarily on the list, but not out of the question.

Playing Doctor/Medical Play. I’m not reallysure what this entails, and could just be some of the other individual stuff I’ve mentioned. But I’ve never actually “played doctor” with anyone. Could be fun.

Enemas. Well, this kinda goes with the May post section about anal play. I’m curious about stuff, just not sure.

Anal/Vaginal Hooks. I know he has them. He talks about/threatens them occasionally. I’d like an opportunity to try them out sometime this year.

Age Play. I dunno. I don’t think this is a big want for me. But some days, coming home to color and watch Disney and let someone else make all the decisions/take care of me, sounds rather nice.

Animal Play. Again, I don’t think I’d want to do this very often. But being a kitty just curled up for stroking with no responsibilities sounds quite relaxing. Neither this, nor age play, sounds at all arousing to me, though, just a space to let go of stress and just be take care of.

Figging. We’ve got another class on it coming up next week. I shy away from it due to a cinnamon oil experience, but there’s still curiosity. How horrible is it really? And the masochist in me gets curious. And wonders about other things too, icy hot, capsaicin, peppermint oil, clove oil. They all sound like horrible ideas. But sometimes we like horrible, don’t we?

Gun Play. Again with the aversion/curiosity. Guns have never been a part of my personal life. Didn’t have them in the house as a kid. Never learned to shoot one. Have only held two handguns in my life, which belongs to boys who were trying to show off. They make loud noises, I’m not fond of loud noise. But they also produce fear, I like fear. I think this one stays in the, not specifically on the list, but not a no category, too.

Hypnosis. We’ve got a couple classes coming up on this topic, so I might have a better answer after one or both of those. It sounds interesting, but of course, I wouldn’t let just anyone in my head, just because I’m curious.

Sounds. That was an interesting class. I’ve had a camera up there, with numbing stuff. It just felt weird. I’m sure, without the numbing stuff, it’d feel a lot different. I don’t think I have enough information to know if I’d want to do this or not. Not sure I can have enough information without trying it. Really seems like something another person can’t really describe to you. Also, have only seen it done on a guy.

Staples. This fits in with the needles/hooks category. Stabby things. Only this is straight in and then (usually) yanked out. With much bleeding. I’m sure I’d do it for his entertainment, and I’m sure it’ give me some lovely adrenaline. And I’m supposed to be trying new things, so.

Vacuum Bed. This sounds awesome. I love compression bondage. Someone was talking about one of these recently. I’d love to try it.

Zentai. These have always intrigued me. A full body suit. I think it’d be great for sensation play and sensory dep play.

So, there we go, a lot of different things I’ve never done, with wide-ranging amounts of interest. What is the official list of things I want to try in 2013? Hot Wax, Fisting, Anal Play, Cutting, Cell Popping, Anal/Vaginal Hooks, Figging/Oils etc, Vacuum Bed, Zentai suit. With a handful of other things on the possibilities list.


Be Still

July 21st, 2012

She stood very still as he circled her. Looking over her body, head to toes. The smile on his face predatory, hungry. He stopped behind her, close. She could feel his breath on her neck. The cloth came fast. Covering her eyes and tied tightly around her head. He brushed by her and grabbed her hands, quick loops and her wrists were secured. Lifted above her head and tied off to the beam. She shivered in anticipation as he stepped away.

Back. His presence large in front of her. Metal at her throat. Tugging, ripping, he cut through her shirt and bra in one quick pull of a rescue hook. The straps were gone in two sharp tugs. She was topless. He grabbed the top of the skirt and pulled her against him. Kissing her hard, he tore the skirt away with one hand and one hook.

He stepped back, and she could feel him pacing around her again. Eyes closed behind the blindfold, she tracked him. Excited, aroused, scared, shivering with cold and energy.

His fingers snaked up into her hair, pulling her head back tight, and a knife was at her throat. She gasped, then froze. He dragged the blade down the center of her chest, eliciting a whimpering moan. She fought to remain still as the tip traced her hips bones, trying not to gasp too hard.

“Be still.”

He let go of her hair, and dragged the knife around her hip to the base of her spine. She clenched her fists, a focus for her energy. He drew the knife up her spine, and back down, teasing. Moaning softly, she clenched her jaw. He slid back around in front of her, drawing the knife across her belly and up to her breasts.

Taking a tight hold on one, he pressed the tip of the knife against the nipple. She gasped sharply, and let it out in a sharp squeal. He pressed harder and her head dropped back, breathing hard. He made large X’s across the nipple with the blade, pressing in with the length, first one way then the next. She thought for sure he would draw blood.

“I can you know.” he answered her unspoken thought. “No one here to see.”

Dropping that breast as her head came up in a snap and a whimper, he moved to the other breast. Dragging the knife from top to nipple and then around underneath. Lifting it with the flat of the blade, he dropped it and slapped the nipple. She squeaked and jumped a tiny bit.

“I said, be still.”

“Yes, Sir.” She gasped, tightening her fists and her resolve.

“This knife is very sharp, when I cut you, and I will, I want it to be my decision.”

“Yes, Sir.” She bit her lower lip.

He set the tip at her shoulder and pulled it fast down to her opposite hip and before she could finish gasping, did it again in from the other shoulder. She clenched her jaw to keep from shivering too hard as she moaned.

Then the knife was at her wrist, trailing down her arm, sharp and tickling, she tightened her fists, jaw and squeezed her eyes tighter to maintain control. Barely breathing, until he reached her chest, and catching it again as he started up the other arm. When he pulled away, she let it out in a hard gasp, and a few whimpering moans. Cut short by the knife blade pressed against her throat, his hand in her hair, his body pressed against hers. He kissed her roughly, pulling her lip away with his teeth as he disengaged.

She felt him crouch down in front of her. The tip of the knife on the side of her heel. He drew it up the inside of her leg, the pitch of her moan going up as the knife rose. She nearly lost it as he dragged it over her labia and barely regained control as he continued down her other leg. She wanted to shake and jump and orgasm, but she held still.

He dragged the knife in short horizontal lines on the insides of her thighs. She gasped with every one. Then he sank his teeth in to replace the knife and she screamed. She could hear him snickering when he pulled away as she gasped for breath.

“Now then, I think I want some blood.” He stood up in front of her again. “But where to start?”

He dragged the blade lazily from shoulder to nipple to sternum to nipple, down to her belly, around her hips, to her back, up her spine and in figure-8s around her back. Slapping her ass with the flat of the blade, she could hear him hmming in contemplation, as she struggled to control her body, breathing and fear.

“Breathe!” He commanded her. “Don’t you pass out on me, I haven’t even cut you, yet.”

She took a deep, steadying breath. She trusted him. It would be fine. She wouldn’t even see the blood. She trusted him. He wanted it. It would make him happy. She wanted it. It would be fine. Breathing, concentrate on breathing. She settled into her body, into her lungs, into the ground. Solid. His presence, warm, strong.

The knife tip was still exploring her body. Her ass, legs, back, sides, belly, breasts, arms, neck, throat, hips. Dragging, poking, sliding easily over her flesh. She focused on the feeling, the arousal, the cool metal on her skin. Moaning softly, breathing deeply, holding herself still for him.

“That’s better. Good girl.”

He lifted her right breast in one hand, and she felt the blade on her skin. Harder, sharper than before. She felt him cutting the straight lines of his first initial into her flesh. Then he set it down and lifted the other, cutting the first initial of his last name into that one. He let it down and she let out the breath she had been holding. The cuts stung as he wiped them with alcohol, and she was concentrating so hard on breathing and not panicking that she barely noticed him untying her hands.

He was behind her, lowering her to the ground, pulling her into his lap, her back against his chest. Wrapping his arms around her waist, kissing her ear and neck.

“Good girl, such a very good girl. All done now, it’s okay you can let go.”

She collapsed into his arms, every muscle relaxing at once. She burst into tears, and burrowed back against him, as he continued to hold her and reassure her. She mumbled her thanks over and over, shaking and crying and gasping. Slowly she melted, and relaxed, a puddle in his arms, calm and so incredibly happy. He pulled off the blindfold, lifted her chin, and kissed her tenderly.

Thank you.


20 Hard Limits

November 21st, 2009

I was asked recently what I would not offer freely. This got me to thinking about my limits. I had not explored them seriously in quite some time. Just random comments of, “no red,” or “you know that’s a hard limit” when things came up. Back when Husband and I first entered the community, I did a lot with lists. Filled out fetish lists, filled out like/dislike/limits lists. But it had been quite a while since I seriously visited the topic, and limits do change over time. My partners have challenged my limits, poking them gently here and there, never Leaping over the line, just prodding it until they made a hole to slip through. Or, in a couple cases, waiting until I changed my mind and Asked to try something.

So I now have three lists. Current Hard Limits, acknowledging that things do change. Previously Hard Limits that have been pushed to Soft Limits, acknowledging that these are still tricky ground, and often partner specific. And a very short Soft Limits list of two things I didn’t know enough to have put on my Hard Limits list in the first place.


Current Hard Limits


Age Play/Infantilism

Animals(yes, this includes snakes)

Furry Play




Blood (except for sex during menstruation)



Cutting of the skin (does not include scraping/scratching or breaking from impact play)

Medical Play (specifically enemas, sounds, catheters)

Removal of my pubic hair


Bull whips (longer than 4 feet)

Significant Facial Impact (smacking, hitting, punching, etc)

Unsafe sex

Public sex (more than two other people present)

Willfully Breaking the Law (only exception is private play in a public area where there is reasonable safety of not being caught, (i.e. sex after dark in a car or park))

Humiliation Play


Previously Hard Limits that have been pushed to Soft Limits

Breath play

Ball gags

Grabbing by the throat

Gentle face slapping


Single Tails(under 4 feet)

Dragon Tails

Sex while menstruating



Soft Limits

Essential Flavored Oils

Diet/Food Control