January 30th, 2011
Whatever BDSM/kink related thing you want to write about.
I do this every week, so check out my blog in general for whatever I wanted to write about. Click a tag that interests you, or one of my vague categories. Enjoy your stay, comment on something, or just take a look around.
January 29th, 2011
Do you have a BDSM title (e.g. mistress, master, slut, pig, whore, princess, goddess, ma’am, sir)? What is your opinion of the use of titles in general?
I call them labels as opposed to titles. Here is my most recent post on Labels. My opinion, simplified, is that they are personal. And my personal title is submissive.
January 28th, 2011
How do you dress for kink/BDSM play? What significance does your attire have to you?
Dressing for play is usually about feeling attractive for myself or about making him happy by choosing something he will like. The skirts I wear on an almost daily basis are a sign of my submission to him – my desire to fulfill a request he has given me.
January 27th, 2011
Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?
I have non-kink interests? Just kidding. I guess, sometimes they do. D&D doesn’t, at least not outright, my group is far too sexually repressed for that. They’re boys, but they’re not kinky. My love of the outdoors does. I’ve had scenes in the woods a few times. Writing, obviously. I write about kink a lot now. So, yes, where appropriate.
January 26th, 2011
What’s your opinion on online BDSM play?
Been there, done that, RL has been better to me.
I’m a writer, I had fun creating scenes with people online. Cybering, if you will. Words are powerful to me. But it isn’t for me anymore. Real life play, with someone who I can touch and hug and curl up with after is what I prefer now.
January 25th, 2011
How open are you about your kinks?
January 24th, 2011
What qualities do you look for in a partner?
Intelligence, Honesty, Compassion, Passion, Respect, Love
Intelligence – He doesn’t have to have college degrees falling off the walls, or be a scientist or lawyer. But he has to have a brain, and he has to use it.
Honesty – Lying will get you no where in my world. I do not deal with deceivers. I understand that we don’t always have all the facts. I understand we change our minds and that our feelings can change, too. But outright, bold faced, intentional lying is a deal breaker.
Compassion – He must care about other people.
Passion – Being excited about something in life. Having things he cares about deeply. Living life, not just surviving.
Respect – Respect for me and for other people.
Love – It does not make sense to spend my time and energy on someone who does not love me.
January 23rd, 2011
Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed? How so?
One year after joining the local community I wrote this. I have grown in so many ways. When I first got into the community and people asked me what I was into, I’d respond with bondage, spanking and nipple pinching. Just look at the list I posted on Day Two. I have come so far, and am still moving forward. I have learned a lot about myself and what I can do, and what I like. When I first developed an interest, I thought I was weird and strange, and alone. But I have found acceptance, love and support. Those things have made all the difference.
January 22nd, 2011
What do you think is important in keeping a BDSM relationship healthy? How does it differ from a vanilla relationship?
Clear and Honest Communication is important in any relationship.
January 21st, 2011
Favorite BDSM related book (fiction or non-fiction).
I have not read the entirety of many BDSM related books, but I really like Douglas Kent’s Complete Shibari: Land and Sky and still need to get my own copies and write a more detailed post about them. Perhaps when the third one comes out.
(pre-publish edit)As I posted Wednesday evening, The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Catherine A. Liszt is also a pretty amazing book, but more about poly than BDSM.