Mirror, Mirror…

October 5th, 2015

A couple quotes for thought today.

“It is the obvious which is so difficult to see most of the time. People say ‘It’s as plain as the nose on your face.’ But how much of the nose on your face can you see, unless someone holds a mirror up to you?” ? Isaac Asimov, I, Robot

“Life would be a lot simpler if you liked the people you were supposed to like.”

I get so frustrated at him sometimes, when I’m upset, or stressed out, and he holds that mirror up. Because I just want to be upset or stressed out for a little while. I want comfort, not solutions. Not permanently, just for a little while. But that’s not who he is. Don’t get me wrong, he is definitely willing and able to give me comfort if I need it. But he is also definitely not willing to let me wallow in self-pity or stress, when there’s no reason for it. Especially when it starts oozing out of me and trying to infect those around me.

I don’t need him to solve it for me, but sometimes, I need him to point out that I’m not solving it either, and I ought to be, and I can. And sometimes I do need him to help me solve it, if I’ve got too much on my plate, and he can help with some of it. I just have to ask. But sometimes it takes that damn shiny mirror for me to see.

Liking who “you are supposed to like” goes back to societal expectations. If this were the norm, I think marriage rates would be higher, and divorce rates much lower. The idea is you would like the person who is right for you, and not the ones who weren’t. Like the one you married and no one else. But we humans have a fascination with the dangerous, with risk, with the grass on the other side of the fence.

For my parents, I was supposed to like a nice, successful boy who faithfully went to church every week. For society, I was supposed to like just one man, after maybe dating a few, one at a time. For my poly world, I was supposed to like those with interest and availability that matched my own. But it’s never that simple, eh?

Then again, what fun would life be if it was simple. We are problem solvers. We thrive on figuring things out, on challenges. If life were simple, it would also be boring, IMHO. One last quote for the day:

“Life is pain, highness, anyone who tells you different is selling something.” ~Westley, The Dread Pirate Roberts, Princess Bride

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