Between Times

May 20th, 2013

What happens in the between times? In those times when you’re waiting for things to happen? What do you between big events? Between date nights? Between emails or phone calls or texts? Between work days? This is the time when you’re just you. You’re alone with yourself. What do you do?

I’ve been playing games lately. Brain games. Logic puzzles. Word games. Crossword puzzles. I’ve been listening to Nerdist podcasts, and watching comics on Youtube. Trying to engage my brain, because I feel old. Too old to be going back to college anyway. It’s grad school, so it’s different, I try to tell myself. Plenty of my friends are back in school these days, I say. But I worry that I won’t be good enough, that I’m not book smart enough anymore. That I have lost my work ethic after ten years in retail. So, I challenge myself, exercise the brain, and my attention span.

I also gather material for a research project of my own. To practice my ‘research’ skills, and my paper writing skills. Because I never really liked doing that in the first place. Reports and papers were the tiresome necessity of school. Whenever I could, I made them creative projects, instead of dry, factual accounts. And that’s okay, so long as you still fulfill the assignment criteria, and your professor is on board with it. This project that I’m doing for myself, and for anyone who ends up wanting to read it, will not be dry and run of the mill, I hope it will be creative and entertaining. Right at the moment, I’m waiting for a 3-hole punch, which seems silly, and highly procrastinatory of me. But I wasn’t planning on being home tonight, and I was planning on having that 3-hole punch already.

This is exactly why I worry about going back to school. But I haven’t set deadlines, and I’m better at other people’s deadlines anyway. So, I’m not really ‘behind’ on it, at least not until I actually start writing it, anyway. Or taking notes or something other than printing out reams of my past writings. It isn’t even summer, yet. Not really, not even past Memorial Day til next week. Plenty of time to get started and create deadlines and meet them. So I say.

I’m between times right now. A weekend of events behind me, a big weekend ahead of me. Application submitted, but not accepted. Plans in the works, but not to be enacted until the end of July/beginning of August. Now have six applications in with the library system. Waiting to hear back, never heard back from the first application I sent to them. So much to do this week, not sure there will be time for us. Should have gone out tonight, but waiting instead. Relaxing with these thoughts.

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